I am so tired of how ignorant the world is when it comes to people’s preferences, whether it be their sexuality, the way they dress or something completely different. Why am I bringing this up today? Because apparently my future wife is ‘confused’ about her gender because she dresses in male clothing, has short hair, goes to a barber shop, is engaged to another girl – or whatever else brought this on. And apparently it’s a joke.
I am really having to take a deep breath right about now, because I feel like I am going to burst at the seams with disappointment, hurt and anger. Mainly disappointment though, because you would expect people to be much more aware of other people’s choices and feelings today. I mean, it is 2017 after all.
The whole point of this blog post is to tell the world that just because Jeanne – and numerous other women, both gay and straight – is not confused about her gender because of her clothing or hairstyle choices. She know that she has a vagina, she has had it for almost 32 years, and she is quite happy being a woman – funnily enough.
Making a choice to go to a barber shop because they cut her hair they way she wants it does not make her confused about her gender.
Waking up every morning and pulling a golf shirt over her head and pulling up a pair of chinos does not make her confused about her gender.
Having short hair does not make her confused about her gender.
Lacing up a pair of trainers shoes does not make her confused about her gender.
Waking up every morning next to another woman does not make her confused about her gender.
In fact, all of the above makes her comfortable and happy and I don’t understand why that is such a big problem. We are all entitled to happiness. Even the person who thought it would be hilarious to mark Jeanne’s gender as ‘confused’ on an important document. (A document that had nothing, in fact, to do with that person in the first place).
More so, why I think that this whole situation pisses me off, is that this is just yet another ignorant and – to put it quite bluntly – stupid, inconsiderate, hurtful and completely unnecessary thing to happen when there is already so much that has happened and that is still going on. Talk about adding fuel to an already raging fire… It literally makes my blood boil.
If anything comes from this post, anything at all, I just want everyone who is reading this to take a moment to realise how your actions – no matter how funny or silly you think they are – can affect someone else. You don’t know what that person is already going through, you don’t know how they will react to your ‘joke’ and you don’t know how it will make them feel.
Your ‘joke’ could make them feel uncomfortable, embarrassed, hurt, traumatized, emotional, angry and so many other things. Your ‘joke’ could have an adverse affect that could impact other people’s lives. Your ‘joke’ could end up just adding to someone’s pain. Your ‘joke’ could end up being anything but harmless.
So please, take a moment and think ‘how would I feel someone else did this to me’. And if you think, ‘shit, it would be nasty and I would feel horrible’, then don’t do it. Simple as that.